Archive for the ‘laugh’ Category

This kind of stuff never happened when I was an 18 year old fireman.  Firefighters these days have it so good.

From the Dallas Morning News

Police [and Firemen] free 26 cheerleaders from elevator at University of Texas Jester Hall

“Police and firefighters were called to the University of Texas’ Jester Hall to free 26 cheerleaders who had crammed themselves into an elevator.

A group of 14- to 17-year-olds attending Texas Cheer Camp in Austin decided to see how many girls they could squeeze into the elevator around 6 p.m. Tuesday, campus police said.

The elevator successfully descended from the fourth floor to the first, but the doors refused to open…[To Read the Entire Article Click Here]


This is yet another in series of humorous and odd conversations with my daughter during our nightly bath time.  Well at least the nights when I don’t come up with an excuse to avoid slipping on my swim trunks and getting in the tub. (more…)

The winner of the first ever Funny Acronym Tuesday (F.A.T.) was Blessed1 with the acronym B.U.R.P. which stands for “Beat up Rude People.”  Admit it, haven’t we all wanted to?!

The winner of the second ever F.A.T. challenge was Teresa with the acronym W.H.A.M.M.Y. which stands for “Wookie Hippies Ate My Mangos Yesterday.”  This is a serious problem deserving of a fitting acronym.  Thankfully we have Teresa around to supply it.

The winner of the “Return of the F.A.T.” challenge (part III) was (more…)

The Sex Police & the War on Sex

“Ken Giles was jogging in a park in Johnson City, Tenn., when, as he put it, “nature called.” He went off the trail to go take care of business. Then an undercover agent “put the badge in my face and told me that I was under arrest. I just thought I was in trouble for urinating in public.”

It was much more humiliating than that. The park was the site of a police crackdown on gay men using the park for sex. But the police went beyond arrests. Before anyone was convicted, they posted the names, addresses and photos of the men.

Giles’s wife saw his picture on the news. Then his employer fired him. “When I lost my job … my wife was so upset that she had a … a major heart attack.”

Another man named by the police killed himself.” – John Stossel

What purpose does this kind of thing serve?  Why can’t police distinguish between someone trying to relieve themselves and someone try to get some kicks from public sex?  Why are police so busy hiding in bushes or bathroom stalls trying to entrap people into engaging in illicit activities?  While engaging in sexual acts in clear public view in front of others should indeed be a crime, There is no need for all this covert activity and undercover work.

Banning Fast Food to Fight Obesity?

“Jan Perry, a Los Angeles city-council member, is spearheading legislation that would ban new fast-food restaurants like McDonald’s and KFC from opening in a 32-square-mile chunk of the city, including her district.” – WSJ

You might ask why?  The standard response from advocates of such measure

“[These measures are] crucial in the fight against obesity, diabetes and other diseases and health conditions.”

While all of you know I take seriously the problem of obesity in America, this is certainly not the way to go about it.  Limiting the choices of all members of society because some abuse their freedom is the very antithesis of what one should expect from their government.  This problem will only be solved when individuals take responsibility for their actions, not when the government bans or sin taxes every last twinkie, Big Mac, or fried food found in fast food restaurants, grocery stores, or your very own fridge.

Grown up P.E.- Do you Still Hit the Dork With Glasses? Wait, That’s me!

“This is Old School P.E., a two-hour exercise program strictly for adults, built around grown-up versions of gym class staples. Participants say getting in shape is a bonus to the main attraction — a Friday night out with friends, away from the kids.” – Yahoo! News (more…)

Yup, here it is, Hitler at a zoo standing in front of an animal\'s cage.  Which animal?  I don\'t know.  But there you go, just for the three of you who searched for it.

There you go, a picture of Hitler at the zoo. Weird, huh?

We begin with the search term that was good enough to become the title of this post.  Seriously, I mention going to the zoo twice and all of a sudden I get THREE hits from people searching the term:

hitler going to the zoo

This of course made me curious.  Are there three people out there who are really interested in seeing Hitler take a brisk yet leisurely walk through a zoo somewhere in Germany?  How odd.

im a big guy and i want to make sex more

Sorry, I can’t help you with that.  However, I can help with your syntax and grammar.  Why not try this search term next time, “I am a full-bodied corpulent man interested in finding a woman with whom I might engage in various acts of fornication and obtain a high degree of carnal knowledge of her female form.”  Hey, at least it sounds more sophisticated and less..uh..cavemanish.

kinky christian in relationship

So, what exactly are you looking for? (more…)

The events in this post take place around 7 p.m.- bath time in our home.  I am sitting in the tub in my swim trunks (since my daughter demands I get in the tub too) surrounded by ponies, McDonald’s Kid’s Meal transformers, and various girly things.  I am attempting to give my daughter a bath, which is surprisingly hard to do when we occupy the same small tub.

My Daughter: Daddy, can I wash your knees?

Me: Sure.

My Daughter: Daddy, can I wash your back?

Me: Sure.

My Daughter: Daddy, can I wash your bagina? (more…)

This morning when I awoke and checked my e-mail, there was a message from someone I had never heard of.  Her name was Jutte McIntos and her email’s subject simply said, “Re: It paays to Meen’s Heatlh.”  At first I was confused.  She had cared enough to capitalize only the first letter of each word, but she had included far too many extra vowels and scrambled up several consonants.  Why?  I went from confused to angry when I opened the email only to discover the following brief and unalluring message: (more…)